Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Control. Adulterate. Delete.

Log on today and visit ControlAdulterateDelete.com! Our revolutionary site is designed to help you cheat on your annoying spouse or significant other! We know there are other sites out there that are very similar, but at ControlAdulterateDelete.com, we utilize the 3 Step System so you can pork your way to success! The 3 Steps can be outlined like so: Control: First of all, control the situation. Sign up at ControlAdulterateDelete.com and our skilled analysts will help you lie to, deceive, and ultimately, cheat on your loved one! Adulterate: Next, hook up with a random stranger and exchange bodily fluids! Come surf our site and find a cute little number to soil your oats in. We got all sizes and colors. You want a 400 pound, black, greasy Chinese guy with buck teeth and a hair lip? Come to our site! You want a 25 pound scandanavian midget wearing nothing but sequin-studded sandals and a pink hat? We got 2 for the price of 1 on Fridays! Delete: Then, just delete your computer history, and you should be home free! Also, our top-notch whores are sworn to secrecy. So, don't tell anyone about your little escapade, and your loved one will NEVER find out! Because let's face it, if you delete it from your history, it never really happened, right? ControlAdulterateDelete.com guarantees that you will have relations with an unknown person within the first 5 days, or the first month is free! Stop sitting at home every night, poking at the same wet spot you've been poking at for years, and get hooked up phat!

No comments: